Sunday, June 27, 2010

~Discipline - "If It Works, Go With It"~

"If it works, go with it". This is always my advice when people ask what our opinions are for discipline.

I was spanked as a kid. Not constantly (I heard you mom, before I finished typing), but when we were really bad and my parents were really fed up, we were spanked. Nothing that required a Dr. Phil session, but something that made us stand there and realize that we better think twice next time. It worked for us and for our parents.

When it came to child rearing of my own, I never said I would not spank. It was not my first choice, but I knew that it worked for my brother and I; we are pretty OK adults now.
With Katelyne we have tried everything... we did time-outs - did not work, we tried taking items away - did not work, hot sauce - no workie, and yes, we did spank - way do not work. Katelyne is my clone, I know how she is working and thinking most of the time, when we would raise our voices or even spank her (the 2 whole times we did), it only pissed her off even more.

This made me realize that she is a "positive reinforcement" type... it is working, I am going with it. I made her a chart for her chores with a space for her attitude. With Tinkerbell... On the left side, are her chores. As she completes a chore, we move one of the Tinkerbell magnets over the chore...
On the right it says "Happy Toot". When she was a little bit younger we called her "Toots", so when she is "caught" being nice and doing something good, she gets a smiley face (I make it a point to "catch" her doing good - it is usually easy to do). We have a set goal of 4 a day.

So, at the end of each day, if she has done all of her chores, and has been a fantastic "helper of the day" (these are her words), and gotten at least the 4 smilies, she gets a prize from the prize bag. And, I must add, my prizes are awesome. There are Hello Kitty things, fun socks, color books and stickers... she LOVES it. So far, she has only had 3 or 4 days of no prize and we have been doing this for about 3 weeks now.... I figure that we are doing great! Katelyne is a smart girl and really a natural please-er, so if we are out and I say, "Thanks Babe, that was really nice/sweet/helpful of you" she will look at me and say, "Did I earn a smiley at home?" and as soon as we are through the door, she is adjusting a magnet... Positive reinforcement is our Mojo right now. Whoo Hoo!

I planted flowers today..... Mmmmmmm, I love Dahlias... beautiful.

1 comment:

  1. You are a wonderful mother....but remember you have Ty coming into his own...and all the above disclipine will have to be adjusted for him....he will not have the thought process our Princess Katelyne has....good luck!